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"I may be stiff, but at least I'm beautiful."
Professor Poofenplotz[src]

"Stiff Beauty" is a brand of hair spray that is Professor Poofenplotz's favorite hair spray, made from the sap of the maracanut tree. It was discontinued because only amusement park clowns used it and when the Old Abandoned Old Abandoned Amusement Park closed it hadn't been selling.

Lyrics

Laura Dickinson: Stiff Beauty!

Songwriters

  • Dan Povenmire
  • Danny Jacob

BMI Work #11941378

Background Information

  • Stiff Beauty is possibly responsible for the near-extinction of the maracanut tree.
  • The spray has a jingle.

Appearances

Previous:
"Doof 'N' Puss (Instrumental)
Songs Next:
"Mix and Mingle Machine"
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