"Real Boy" is a song from the Season 3 episode "A Real Boy". It was performed by Heinz Doofenshmirtz's robot, Norm, to explain his dreams of being a real boy.


Women Singers: He wants to be a real boy... (He wants to be a real boy)
He wants to be a real boy... (Real boy, yeah)

Norm: I'm a lonely orphan robot,
Just a scrap metal tower.
A misfired piston,
Run on squirrel power.

Women Singers: His galvanized insides
Can feel no joy,
He wants to be a real boy...

Norm: I wanna be a real boy!
Rappers: Yeah!
Norm: Not a titanium toy!
Don't give my battery flattery,
What I want is more grey matter-y!
Rappers: A brain, some veins, and some arteries!
Norm: I got a squirrel on a treadmill where my heart should be!

If I was real,
Rappers: You could feel!
Norm: I could really emote!
Instead of shorting out whenever he sits on the remote!
I want a dad!
Rappers: A father!
Norm: Someone I can call pop!
Someone to take me out for malteds at the soda shop!
Someone to take me on a fishing trip or teach me how to ride a bike!
Who'll pat me on the head and ask me "how you doin', tyke?"
Women Singers and Rappers: How you doin', tyke?

Norm: Oh, I'm fine, all things considered!
Wanna be a real boy, but I don't wanna sound embittered!
But thanks for asking, seriously!


I'm could really emote
View the image gallery for Real Boy.

Background Information

  • Appropriately, given both the rap genre and the fact that this song is about a robot, this song features various examples of Auto-Tune, a pitch-correction technology that is frequently used in sung portions of hip-hop songs to give singers a unique, almost robotic-sounding tinge to their vocals.
  • The female singers were Olivia Olson's voice.
  • This the first song where Norm is the main singer.
  • The only difference between this and the demo version is that this version doesn't have the final verse.
  • Norm's movements will sometimes make a sound similar to the Skype receiving sound.
  • The music starts out relaxing then turns into rap, much like the song "Spa Day" from "Spa Day".
  • Many people who appeared in "S.I.M.P. (Squirrels In My Pants)" from "Comet Kermillian" also appear during the song.


  • Norm's squirrel does not run on a treadmill as stated in the song but on a hamster wheel.


BMI Work #13364041



"Evil Jingle" ("A Real Boy")
Songs Next:
"Yodel Odel Obey Me" (Instrumental)
"Platypus Walk" (#1)
Phineas and Ferb: Rockin' and Rollin' Next:
"Football X7" (#3)
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