Traffic Cam Caper/Transcript

But, Mom, it's true.

The boys built an elevator to the moon in the backyard today.

Last time I checked, the yard was noticeably moon-elevator-free.

But - It's true.

We were up there.

Ferb did the whole "one giant step" thing.

Check out this moon stuff we brought back.

Hmm?

Oh, you boys are so adorable.

Ugh! You don't believe it.

I'm so over this.

Oh, Candace, revel in your brothers' imagination.

Makes life so much more fun.

(yawn) Pushing the boundaries of time and space sure makes a guy tired.

See? How fun is that?

Night, boys.

Night, mopey.

(mimics)See?

How fun is that?

(sighs)If only they'd believe me...

Look at this.

I got a traffic ticket from that camera they installed across the street.

Oh, that blasted device picks up everything on the block 24 hours a day.

(Mom)Doesn't it run out of tape?

Oh, no. It's on a compressed CD thingamabob.

It can store months of digital video.

Video.

Hon, you know we drive on the right.

Yes, yes, so you keep telling me.

Gotcha!

(snoring) (device vibrates) (♪ spy theme) Excellent trick, Agent P.

Sorry to disturb you at this late hour, but we are about to give you the most important mission of your career.

Our computer indicates that a city security camera located near your civilian hideout has recorded your comings and goings as a secret agent.

It's crucial to the agency's security that you get those recordings and bring them back to HQ for special disposal.

(Candace)Heh-heh-heh-heh.

Heh-heh-heh-heh.

(continues giggling) (♪ hums) I'm just borrowing this.

♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪

(gasps)There it is!

The elevator to the moon.

Ha!

And the time they built the roller coaster and the beach and the roller rink!

(squealing) (muffled manic laughter) Can it be? Actual proof?

Everything they've done over the summer?

Oh, Perry, it's so beautiful!

Candace, you OK?

Your muffled emotion woke us up.

Whatcha watchin'?

Oh, just a little summer mini-series called "evidence." Oh, cool.

Our moon elevator.

Mom would love this.

I wonder if she's still up.

Let's show her.

Yes! Let's show Mom.

Oh, Perry, Perry, Perry.

I will remember this night always.

Just think - on this very computer are the deliciously incriminating images from that CD I borrowed that will finally bust my brothers.

(laughs maniacally) (Mom)All right, Candace, what's going on in there?

Mom, I finally got the evidence that will prove that - Oh, not this again!

Show me in the morning.

(Phineas)How's 7:00 sound?

And you too.

Outta here.

We're gonna pencil her in for 7:30.

Nine.

Make that 9:00.

♪ Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated ♪ After hours ♪

What is it?

Oh-Oh, Perry the Platypusss.

Uh, hold on one second.

What? The pressures of an evil life.

I need a grind guard.

Wait a minute.

Why are you here?

You're not due to shatter my plans till tomorrow.

Oh, come on in.

Hi. I'm Norm.

That's it? You just want to borrow Norm, my giant robot man?

Fine. Knock yourself out.

I'm going back to bed.

Just so you know, he's a little low on oil.

Oh, and-and, Perry the Platypus...

I don't want to see one scratch on that mathine.

Hi. I'm Norm.

Hey, Candace, Ferb wants to get started on the multimedia presentation for Mom.

Can we borrow the CD?

No way, Phineas.

There's no way I'm lettin' this baby out of my sight.

This is the single greatest moment in my life, and there is nothing you little creeps can do to take it away from me.

Hello, children.

I'll take that.

My name is Norm.

What was... that?

I don't know, but it was cool.

(Mom)Keep it down!

So... you guys didn't make that?

No, but I want one.

But that thing ran off with my disk! My evidence!

Don't worry, Candace.

We'll help you get it back.

You guys would help me bust you?

Sure, if it'll make ya happy.

Plus, battling a giant robot - how cool is that?

Excellent.

Let's go kick some robot heinie!

What a lovely evening.

There he is!

Uh-oh. We need to get the lead out.

Switching to hyper-transportation mode.

We're gonna need a faster bike.

Any word from Agent P?

No, sir.

So I guess all we can do is wait.

And hope, sir.

And hope.

And also wait.

I already did "wait," Karl.

Did we do "hope"?

Ohh.

I didn't become a major so I could sweat out a vaudeville routine with an intern.

Of course not, sir.

So, anyone know any good songs?

How about you, Agent D?

(barks) Agent C?

(squawks) (clucking) Karl, remind me again why all the agents are animals.

(female computerized voice) Estimated time to destination, 3.05 minutes.

(Norm) We'll be there in no time!

(female computerized voice) Warning: Oil level low.

I could sure use an oily beverage.

(♪ folk) ♪ And the kitty goes...

(meows) ♪ And the owl goes...

(hoots) ♪ And the doggy goes...

(barks) ♪ And the turkey goes...

♪ And the turkey goes...

Ahem.

Sir, we lost Agent T last November.

Ooh. Right. Ahem.

(♪ continues playing) ♪ And that's how the animals go, go, go ♪ And that's how the animals go ♪

OK, everyone, one more time with feeling.

(squawks) Good thing we had this extra rocket engine, huh?

Whoop, here we go again.

Uh-oh. Someone forgot to replace the oil cap.

I guess I'm walking.

Aah!

Go get him, Ferb!

Hey, kids, this is not a gymnasium.

Boy, I'm sure in a pickle.

Whoo-hoo!

cleats.

Candace, help!

The oil! I-I'm slipping!

I'm coming!

Hold on, Phineas!

Candace!

(sighs) But, Candace, the disk.

You didn't save it.

What? And let you fall?

You may be a pain, but you are my brother.

Besides, I still have that big rocket for evidence.

What happened to the rocket?

Hmm. Good thing we got off of that, huh?

(both)All right, Ferb!

You got the disk!

(Candace)Cool!

(Phineas)All right!

(Candace)Ferb?

Ferb, where you going?

Ferb?

What did I miss?

Huh?

Well, that was almost weirder than the giant robot.

♪ Perry ♪

Ah, Agent P.

I trust that your mission was a complete success.

Good work.

Now, hand it over for the special disposal procedure.

Careful, now. Careful.

Got it.

Agent P, you've saved this organization.

If there's anything we can do for you in return, don't hesitate.

(Dad)Oh, I can't believe it!

It seems my video traffic ticket's been cleared.

I guess there is someone up there looking out for me.

(chatters) ♪ Oh, the chicken goes...

(clucks) ♪ And the dog goes...

(barks) ♪ And the worm goes...

Outstanding, Agent W!

(clucks) Agent C, don't do that.

♪ And the new guy goes...

I'm Norm.

You know, Karl, it's weird that he's not an animal.

We should fire him.

I am already on it, sir.