O.W.C.A. Files/Transcript

Prologue
(Scene opens on a carnival at night. A car pulls up. A rather round looking gentleman comes out accompanied by two accomplices wearing sunglasses and berets. Perry the Platypus appears in the dunking booth. He pops out of the water and signals, to a hyena trainee, Harry the Hyena. Harry accidentally hits the target and dunks Perry.)

Harry the Hyena: Oh? Hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee! (grunts) Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh!!

(Cut to another part of the carnival. A red macaw trainee, Maggie the Macaw, hides among the stuffed animal prizes. She takes out binoculars from her fedora. In another section, a Siamese cat trainee, Karen the Cat, is just standing around. Cut to Doof's bedroom. His alarm clock on the floor goes off. Doof shoves his lamp off his nightstand and feels around for the clock and falls out of his bed.)

Doofenshmirtz: Oh, no! The mission!

(Song: O.W.C.A. Files)

Come on!

Major Monogram: These are the stories of the agents of the O.W.C.A. These are the OWCA Files!

We got animal agents wearing brown fedoras

If you're a villain then ya can't ignore us

Your evil plan is gonna fall before us

I will explain it better when we get to the chorus

'Cause if you find yourself hanging out on a limb

And your chances of survival are increasingly slim

All the odds are stacked against you and your prospects are grim

Call the Organization Without a Cool Acronym

It's the OWCA Files (yeah!)

(the OWCA Files)

It's the OWCA Files

(the OWCA Files)

It's the OWCA Files (the Organization Without a Cool Acronym!)

(the OWCA Files)

It's the OWCA Files

(the OWCA Files)

OWCA!

(Cut to a rather scary room. Pan down to reveal the room is rigged with explosives. Cut to Agent P in a capsule. He takes off his fedora, gets out his blowtorch, climbs on top of Harry the Hyena and burns a hole through the top of the capsule. He starts to burn a hole through the bottom but Karen the Cat jumps on top of him.)

Karen the Cat: Meow!

(The capsule starts to drop down. Agent P burns a hole through one side. The side drops off and bangs onto one of the explosives.)

Doofenshmirtz: Aw, looks like you might need my help after all! Lucky for you I brought a rope, with a dreamcatcher on the end! That's what you call style!

(Song: They Left Me Standing Outside)

(Oooooh,

Ooooh, whooo whooo

Oooh, yeah yeah, yeah)

They look so focused,

They're makin' plans.

They're talkin' strategy

That doesn't include me.

They made a model of a hideout,

Little figurines,

But now my little guy's got

Shattered dreams.

They don't want me, they don't need me

Now I'm all alone.

Sittin' with this coffee

And a five-dollar scone.

I could help, but my hands are tied.

They left me standin' outside.

(They don't want me.)

They left me standin' outside. (They don't need me.)

(They don't want me.)

Oh, they left me standin' outside. (They don't need me.)

(Ooooh, whooo whooo

Oooh, yeah yeah, yeah)

Ahhh, yeah. (Oooooh,

Ooooh, whooo whooo

Ohhh... (Oooh, yeah yeah, yeah)

(Oooooh,)

A whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa yeah. (Ooooh, whooo whooo

Oooh, yeah yeah, yeah)

(Song: Bits of All of Us)

Doofenshmirtz: They say there is no "I" in teamwork,

But there's an "M" and there's an "E" (That's "me").

I mean, you can't have a team without individuals,

On that we can agree.

Wait a minute, guys. Bear with me just a second here, okay. Watch this, ready?

You take the "T" from the end of "Doofenshmirtz",

And the "E" from "Karen the Cat",

Harry has an "A" in it and Maggie's got an "M",

So we're a team, my friends. That's that.

Oh, that was easier than I thought it would be. If only we had a "W", we could spell out "teamwork". (sighs) That's right! "Macaw" has a "W" in it!

You take the "T" that's very deep in "Doofenshmirtz",

"E" from Karen the Cat,

Harry's got an "A" in it and Maggie's got an "M",

So we're a team, my friends, that's that.

So "macaw" gives us a "W",

We get "O" from "ocelot" (That's me!)

We get an "R" from Harry and a "K" from Karen,

And teamwork's what we've got.

That's right! Teamwork's what we've got!

So we just need to work together,

Cooperate and trust,

Cuz there is no "I" in "teamwork",

But there are bits of all of us!

Okay, big finish!

So we just need to work together (Together!)

Cooperate and trust (And trust!)

There may be no "I" in "teamwork",

But there are bits (There are bits)

That's right there are bits (there are bits)

Of all of uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuus!

Okay, now let's spell out "collaborative alliance".

Okay, there's a "C" in—

Oh, I'm just kiddin'! I'm just kiddin'! Come on back!

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