The Best Lazy Day Ever/Transcript

Scene opens up showing a sunrise.

[Alarm Clock rings]

Phineas: Beat you to it again, slow poke. [Laughs] Hey, Ferb, ready to build the fastest, safest, most on-time backyard railroad ever?

Ferb: [Puts on railroad hat]

Phineas: All right! You man the boiler, I'll handle the brakes. Perry can be the station's mascot.

[Perry chatters]

Wow. It's really nice out today. It's almost like everything in nature is simultaneously saying...

Squirrel: Ahh!

Bird/Worm: Ahh!

Spider: Ahh!

Baby Spiders: Ahh!

Patient: Ahh.

Phineas: You know, Ferb, everyday we do something really big. But you know the one thing we haven't done? Relax. I say we take advantage of this perfect day and have the best do-nothing day ever!

Candace: Hey, Stacy. Yes, yes. I'm ready for Jeremy's band's outdoor concert at the summer festival! Today's gonna be amazing!

[Clock ticks]

[Sniffs]

All right, what gives? It's already 9:00 and there's no construction noise, no delivery trucks, no-- [Bird chirps] No nothing? They're just standing there. Like statues. Statues...

Phineas: Good thinking, Ferb. We'll put these decoys up so Candace thinks we're doing nothing. The when Candace isn't looking, we'll do something! [Wicked Laughter]

Candace: [Gasps] Not today they don't!

Linda: Hi, boys. Whatcha doin'?

Phineas: We're doing nothing today.

Linda: Well, I'm off to the festival to set up my tea cozy stand. Bye! Phineas: Bye, Mom! Hey, where's Perry?

[Garbage clattering]

[Dance music; Record scratch]

Major Monogram: Oh, hey, Agent P. Carl, give me a close up! So, uh, anyway... Stop Doofenshmirtz! Hit it, Carl! [Dance music]