Out to Launch/Transcript

Episode opens with Phineas, Ferb and Perry sitting under the tree in the backyard listening to the radio.

Radio Announcer: It's another gorgeous summer day here in the Tri-State Area. Ladies, have you asked a date to the Night of the Falling Stars Girls-Choice Dance yet? It seems Danville's gone star-crazy waiting for the meteor shower tonight!

Phineas: A meteor shower? How cool is that? Just think: somewhere out in space there's a bunch of asteroids headed right for Earth!

Lawrence: Hey boys? Boys? Oh there you are! Look what I got for you online!

Phineas: Oh, cool! You named a star after us!

Lawrence: You're now the owners of a little piece of the universe!

Phineas: Did you get one for Candace to?

Lawrence: Well, I did. Yes of course I did, although she doesn't really care about this stuff. Anyway, they're practically giving 'em away online! D'you know, it's even better than the Oklahoma land rush of 1889!

Linda: Ah, those corny history references made me fall for him in the first place. Vivian and I are off to our Mah-Jog tournament. Have fun today, Boys.

Lawrence: Okay, darling. Good luck.

Phineas: Good luck!

Lawrence: Well, what am I doing standing here when I can be out buying more stars?

Phineas: Hey, Ferb. Now that we own a star, we should go check it out! And how cool is space travelling? The G-Forces, eating dinner out of a tube, going to the bathroom without going to the bathroom, not to mention the weightlessness. Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today.

Candace: Uh, Jeremy, I was wondering, uh... if you'd like to go the the Night of the Falling Stars Girls-Choice Dance with me.

Jeremy: With you? You've got to be kidding me. [Laughing]

[Boys join in]

[Everyone joins in]

[More people join in]

[Earth blows up]

Candace: And that, Stacy, is why I can't ask Jeremy to the dance.

Stacy: You realize that's kind of a worse-case scenario, right?

Candace: That could very well happen. What if he says no? What if he laughs in my face?

Stacy: You can't let fear rule your life, Candace. Jeremy likes you. He's not gonna say no. Now, I'm gonna hang up, and when I do, I want you to call Jeremy. Don't man the phone, girl. Phone the man!

Candace: Yeah, I am not gonna let fear rule my life. [Dials number]

Stacy: [Muffled] Hello?

Candace: Stacy? Yeah, I can't do it.

♪ Let's take a rocket ship to space ♪

♪ I hear it's a real swinging place ♪

♪ There isn't much air, or gravity there, ♪

♪ The stars will make your heart ra-ace ♪

♪ Let's take a rocket ship, let's take a rocket ship ♪

♪ Let's take a rocket ship to space! ♪ [Rocket blows up]

♪ Let's take a saucer to the stars ♪

♪ Look out moon, move over mars ♪

♪ The martians all rock, to bassie and bach ♪ [2nd rocket blows up]

♪ So bring your maracas and jazz guitars ♪

♪ Let's take a saucer to the stars ♪

♪ [Interlude] ♪

[3rd rocket blows up]

♪ Let's take a rocket ship, a crazy three-staged rocket ship, ♪

♪ Let's tae a rocket ship to space! ♪

Ferb: [Ding]

Phineas: And this is Mission Control.

Isabella: It's inds small.

Phineas: Oh, it looks small on the outside. But Ferb really knows how to maximize space.

Isabella: Phineas, can I ask you something? Will you go to the dance-

Katie: Excuse me Phineas, can I get you to sign some liability waivers?

Phineas: Sure thing. Hold that thought, Isabella.

Isabella: Sure. No prob.

[♪Dramatic music]

Why are you guys walking so slow?

Phineas: Dramatic effect. [Guitar]

Isabella: You guys ready?

Phineas: The star coordinates are preprogrammed. Let's light this candle.

Isabella: All systems go. Commence countdown.

Gretchen: [Deep voice] 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, [Bird crashes into rocket] 2, 1. [Clears throat; Normal voice] Ignition.

Phineas: It's preprogrammed. As long as you don't start hitting buttons randomly, everything will be OK.

Candace: I can't hear you! I'm too busy hitting buttons randomly!

By the way, Candace, where's Perry?

Candace: I don't know. He must've gotten off before we launched.

Major Monogram: Agent P, afraid I have terrible news. It's Doofenshmirtz. He's built a space station, and due to budget cuts, we have no way of getting you into space. Now, I've contacted the president, and... Agent P, are you in space? Nice work. You are always one step ahead. Your mission is to find Doofenshmirtz and stop him, Agent P.

♪ Perry! ♪

Agent P? Agent P?

Candace: Uh, guys, what are all these red flashing things heading toward my rocket?

Phineas: Yeah, those are asteroids.

Candace: Asteroids? Aah!

Just like Beggar's Canyon back home.

We're cattching up to her.

Aah! Aah!

Oop, she lost her engines.

Let's go get her.

I can't believe it's Perry the Platypus.

(chuckles) Perry the Platypus, what are you doing here?

I thought you guys were having budget cuts.

Well, it just shows to go ya.

Hey, let's walk and talk.

So, you're probably wondering why my space station has two enormous arms.

Well, what you should be wondering is why it has two giant hands.

Heh-heh-heh-heh.

See, during my teen years, I was very adept at hand shadows.

It was great for entertaining at parties and for meeting frauleins.

But then one day, there was a new puppeteer in town.

His name was Hans, and his hands were huge.

We called him Huge Hands Hans.

His puppetry was garbage, but unfortunately, it was good enough for my fraulein.

I lost her to a boy with bigger fingers, and I never did a shadow puppet again.

Until tonight.

Heh-heh-heh.

And when the sun rises in one hour - see, right over there - then everyone in the tri-state area will see my enormous hand shadows on the moon!

There she is.

Uh-oh, this isn't good.

Candace, you're in a decaying orbit.

What does that even mean?

You just need to get to the spacesuit on the hook behind you.

Ok.

Now put it on.

OK, I'm puttinit on.

Walk over to the door...

OK, I'm at the door.

Now open it and take a little spacewalk to our What?

Candace, there's nothing to be scared of.

Nothing to be scared of?

There's the never-ending, icy-cold, soul-sucking darkness of space.

I hear negative.

There is no way I'm going out there.

We're just a few yards away.

You can't let fear rule your life.

Of course I can.

That's my Candace, just calm down and take Ferb's hand.

Ferb's hand? Aah!

Aah!

Thanks, guys.

Mission Control?

Come in, Mission Control.

Phineas, did you find Candace?

Yes. We've got her, and we're on our way home.

Excellent. So, Phineas, speaking of home, there's that dance tonight, and - (alarm goes off) Hold that thought, Isabella.

I think we're out of fuel.

What? Find some fuel somewhere and let's go.

That's gonna be hard.

We're kinda nowhere.

You mean we're stuck here in the empty void of space?

Phineas... what is that?

I have no idea.

(man) Ah, will the owner of a red station wagon please move your vehicle?

You are in a shuttle loading and unloading zone only.

What is that?

I have no idea.

Milk shakes?

Wow, that was so bright, I thought it was a star.

Maybe we'll find some fuel here.

Are you sure you don't wanna come with us?

Ferb says the oxygen levels are just like Earth.

Uh... I'm sure.

Just find some fuel, and let's get out of here.

(♪ discordant music) One sarsaparilla coming up.

I love you, man.

Hi. I'm Phineas, and this is Ferb.

(music stops) Wait a second.

You're Phineas and Ferb?

Yeah.

Hey, everyone, it's the new owners.

(aliens cheer) New owners?

Those coordinates are right here.

Ferb, this is our star.

Wow. That sign really is bright.

I told you they'd show up.

So now that you own the joint, what do you think of it?

I know, it's a little run-down.

I have a few ideas for this place.

(boys laugh) You do realize that's a worst-case scenario, right, Candace?

But I do feel for ya.

I've been trying to ask Phineas to that same dance...

Phineas. What's taking those boys so long?

They were supposed to find fuel ages ago.

Later, Isabella.

Sure. No prob.

(muffled rock music playing) (Cockney accent) Stop right there.

Lemme in, buster.

Phineas and Ferb don't take kindly to gate crashers.

I'm no gate crasher.

I'm their sister.

Ooh, sorry about that.

Honest mistake.

You won't mention this to them, eh?

(male voice) I'm their sister.

♪ Yeah (♪ rock) ♪

♪ There's a jumpin' little rock in the outer spiral arm ♪

♪ May not be pretty, but it's got a lotta charm ♪

♪ It's a shooting-star milk shake bar, yeah ♪

♪ It's not a nebula, it's not a quasar ♪

♪ It's a shooting-star milk shake bar ♪

♪ At the speed of light, you know you're never too far ♪

♪ From the meatiest meteor that you'll ever find ♪

♪ In this big ol' galactic void ♪

♪ You got to shake, shake-shake, shake your asteroid ♪

♪Shake, shake-shake, shake your asteroid ♪

Hey, Candace, guess what.

This isourstar.

I thought we were getting out of here.

Ferb and I thought we'd fix up the place.

You know, pride of ownership?

Take a load off.

Have a shake.

I can't do it.

Uh, are you OK?

(sobs)No. The bicentennial Taming of the Yarks Dance is tonight, and I wanna ask the girl of my dreams, but what if she says no?

What if she laughs in my face? What if her friends laugh at me?

What if her friends' friends laugh at me?

Aren't you being a little overly dramatic?

I mean, really, what's the worst thing that could happen?

Uh... the entire planet could blow up?

Please. I think you should just ask her to the dance.

Really? You think so?

I do. Really.

Well... OK.

(sighs) Here goes nothin'.

Ahem. Sylvia...

will you go to the dance with me?

Well, of course.

I've been waiting for you to ask me.

I mean, even if you asked someone else, I'd still have to go with you.

See?

That wasn't so hard.

So... Candace?

Oh, I get it.

Big lesson.

I learned that it wouldn't be hard to ask Jeremy out if he was growing out of the back of my head.

You find us some fuel, and let's get outta here.

Wow. I just wanted to know if she liked the shake.

You don't know where we could find some rocket fuel, do ya?

Rocket fuel?

It's all Ronaldo drinks.

(Italian accent) Only imported rocket fuel.

Grazie.

(Candace)Let's go!

Hey, Ferb, I'm sensing Candace wants to leave.

(♪ carnival) Will you cut that out?

OK, that's it.

I'm not waiting anymore.

Great.

Let's park the shuttle.

Oh, come on!

(muffled)Uh-oh. I think I should go inside now.

Why are we stopping?

I don't get it.

We have plenty of fuel.

The battery's worn down.

Candace, were you using the videophone without the engine running?

Yeah. Was that a bad thing?

If by "bad," you mean we're stranded in the never-ending, icy-cold, soul-sucking darkness of space...

then, yeah.

Soon, Perry the Platypus, the sun will be at full strength, and my plan will come to fruition.

Unless, of course, it's overcast...

(alarm beeping) Proximity alert?

Why are there so many people in space?

What's up with that?

You need another jump-start?

Candace, didn't you have the engine running when we were talking on the videophone?

Am I the only person who doesn't know this?

So, any suggestions, Isabella?

Sensors are indicating a massive power source in your area.

Where?

I don't see it.

Wait a minute.

I see it.

It's Mom's car.

We're saved!

Ferb, toss me the starter remote.

Ooh, that's right.

We left it at home.

What's a starter remote?

Well, legally we're too young to start a car.

We get away with it by using a starter remote.

But you, Candace, have your learner's permit.

Looks like you'll be doing the jump-starting.

What? Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

Can't you guys just find some old nuts and bolts lying around and jury-rig up some kind of machiney dealy-bob and get us out of this situation?

Candace, we are just kids.

Aah!

Why am I arguing this?

Hand me the suit.

Let me turn on the oxygen.

Does this suit make my butt look big?

Yes. Yes, it does.

Maybe I had the pressure up too high.

Never mind.

I'll fix it.

Well, I guess this is preferable.

You can do this, Candace.

I can do this.

I can do this.

I can do this.

I can't do this.

I can't do this.

What is this?

Now, why would an astronaut wear such big gloves?

Wait a second.

Huge Hands Hans!

It's Huge Hands Hans!

He found me out in space.

Oh, you're not going to steal a job from me this time, Huge Hands Hans.

Nor my frauleins.

How did it go again, Phineas?

It's positive to positive.

Positive to positive.

Negative to ground.

What ground?

We're in space.

No, no.

Ground just means any piece of metal.

Any piece of metal?

Well, then why do they call it ground?

Why don't they just call it me- Ooh.

What's wrong, Candace?

Candace?

Candace, what's wro- Oh.

Danville, we have a problem.

OK, girls, turn to the giant robot section of your Fireside Girls manuals.

Isabella, anything?

Still looking.

Aah!

Isabella!

Here it is. OK.

According to this, you should get the heck out of there.

Great, but we've got no power. She didn't connect the - Candace, negative to ground!

What?

(Phineas) Negative to ground, Candace.

Negative to ground!

Oh, you mean negative to metal.

(gasps) I did it! I did it!

She did it.

(squeals) No!

Huge Hands Hans is getting away!

Not this time, freak fingers!

Just you wait, Huge Hands Hans.

You can run, but you can't hide!

You know, he can run, but he can't - Ow!

Wait a second.

How did you...?

Oh, I see. That's it.

That's not fair!

Oh, that's it.

It's on now.

(gasps) Aah!

(squeaks) Isabella, I hate to bother you again.

u got anything else?

The robot's gaining on us.

It says they don't corner well.

They don't corner well?

Wait a sec.

Candace, fasten your seat belt.

We're taking a little detour.

Now, how is she passing us?

Phineas, what are you doing?!

Aah!

See?

Corners like a dream.

Aah!

That's it. Run away, Perry the Scaredy - Oh.

(muffled)Oh, I think I need to put on my spacesuit.

Uh-oh.

And now, my good man, you ready for this?

Your tip.

Your very own star.

Uptown, they give quasars.

Ah, sweet land.

(kisses) (girls)Yay!

Hey, Phineas, you guys were great.

Thanks. You weren't too bad yourself.

Oh.(giggles)Thanks.

So, would you like to go to the Night of the Falling Stars Girls' Choice Dance tonight?

Sounds like fun.

Really?

Ferb, what's our schedule like?

OK, we'll be there.

Both of you?

Yeah.

Why don't you come by, and we'll all walk over together?

Sure. No prob.

Thanks for the lift, Viv.

Mom!

Hey, sweetheart.

Oh, look at your outfit.

Hey, guess what.

We won.

But the grand prize was a star.

Ohh, whoo!

Mom, that's great, but you gotta see something in the yard.

Come on, you gotta see it.

Come on, come on.

All right, I'm a-comin'.

Hmm.

I'll be right with you after I pull my car into the garage.

Yes! It's still here.

See, Mom? There. Mom?

I'm just backing the car in.

I'll be right with you.

(rumbling) So what did you want to show me, Candace?

Just go make some pie.

Or, how about a healthy fruit salad?

Oh, curse this tin can.

Ohh, I'm going to need a jump-start.

I, uh, no, I guess it won't help now.

Say, Candace?

What?

Ferb and I just wanted to say thank you.

We were in a pretty precarious situation up there.

If it wasn't for your bravery, who knows what would have happened.

Really?

You think I'm... brave?

Are you kidding?

Ferb was goin' on and on about it.

Yeah, I was brave.

(gasps)I was brave.

I'm not gonna let fear rule my life anymore.

Now I've gotta go.

I've got a mission to accomplish.

[Perry chatters]

Hey, Perry. Where ya been?

(knock on glass) Aah!

(deep voice) Jeremy, will you go to the dance with me?

Jeremy: Candace?

(giggles)Yeah.

Ha-ha. I've been waiting for you to ask me.

Really?

Yeah.

Only, uh, Candace, is that what you're gonna wear?

Why? You like it?

Credits roll

(♪ "Let's Take A Rocket Ship To Space")

Jeremy: Hey, Candace, look. A shooting star just for us.

♪ Let's take a rock ship, a crazy three-stage rocket ship,

let's take a rocket ship to space! ♪

Doofenshmirtz: Aaaah! Curse you, Perry the Platypus! And you to, Huge Hands Hans!

Voice: It's the final frontier, baby.