Boyfriend From 27,000 B.C./Transcript

(Scene opens up showing the Flynn-Fletcher house.)

Narrator: And now, back to Neanderthal; The Pride of the (?). The Neanderthals were great makers of tools, as well as skilled hunters. It's also believed that they had a highly advanced language. For example: (Screaming/Babbling)

Woman: (Screams)

Narrator: (Laughing/Screaming) ...Is how they may have said "I love you" or "Please take out the trash". But one day, the fateful ice storms came. The Neanderthals blamed each other for being ill-equipped to survive the harsh cold. Many were frozen in glaciers and may be preserved to this very day. We will return to our program after a brief word from our sponsor.

(Song: Sandwich Town jingle)

Turkey on rye or plain bologna meat

Our sandwich guy will make you want to eat

Phineas: I wonder if there's a caveman in the Danville Glacier.

Announcer: Come on down to Sandwich Town.

(Angelic chorus)

Phineas: Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today! (Come back with Sandwiches) You know what else we should do today? (Gulps) Go search for a caveman at the Danville Glacier!

Candace: Oh, I've got to find the perfect outfit to wear to Stacy's costume party. That's it! A disco diva! Nah. A corn dog! Nah. I know! I'll ask Jeremy! What do you think about my costumes, Jeremy? (As Jeremy) Gee, Candace, U think you look beautiful and everything. Will you be my girlfriend? (Cell phone rings) (As herself) Oh, yes, Jeremy! I will be your girlfriend! (Ringing continues) What? The prom? (At phone) What?!

Jeremy: Uh, Candace?

Candace: (As Jeremy) No-- Uh, just a minute, please. (Throws bear away) (Clears throat) Hi, Jeremy!

Jeremy: Hey, Candace. Are you going to Stacy's party?

Candace: Yes.

Jeremy: Cool. It's gonna be wicked. I'm going as a caveman. I'll see you there.

Candace: (Giggles) Bye, Jeremy! (Hangs up) Ghee! It's perfect! I'll dress up like a cave woman, and Jeremy and I will be all matchy, and it'll be like we're on a date! (Laughs excitedly, throwing clothes)

Phineas: Okay, let's go over our checklist.

Lawrence: Well, boys, we're off to the Center for Historically Relevant Botanical Gardens, a virtual treasure trove of topical topiaries.

Linda: I'm sure it'll be riveting. What are you boys doing today?

Phineas: Archaeological dig!

Linda: Okay. Don't touch the flower beds.

Phineas: Wouldn't think of it! (Car departs) Hey, where's Perry?

(Suspense music)

(Birds chirping)

Major Monogram: (Chuckles) Oh, there you are, Agent P. (Chuckles) Carl, he fell for it! (Chuckles)

Carl: (Chuckles)

Major Monogram: We were just kidding about the whole magpie costume. (Perry rips off beak) Anyway, Doofenshmirtz is up to something. Seek out that wild-eyed miscreant and found out what he's up to.

Carl: Ooh! Tell him to do it dressed as a rabbit!

Major Monogram: Ooh, and Agent P, could-- Could you do it dressed as a... Bunny? (Laughs)

Carl: Good one, sir!

Major Monogram: A big pink bunny!

Perry!